May Day! May Day!

The Rites of Spring, Bawmer Blitz Style

Typical Baltimore. Nothing happens here all year, and then, with the coming of the Rites of Spring, everything happens in the course of one long weekend. Like this one.

Thursday night kicks off the first First Thursdays celebration, which includes WTMD's First Thursdays Concerts in the Park series in Mt. Vernon at 5:30 p.m., followed by First Thursday Nights at the Baltimore Museum of Arts (including the BMA's First Thursdays Film Series at 8 p.m., tonight's film being Michael Haneke's 1989 film The Seventh Continent), followed by the opening night of 9th annual Maryland Film Festival at 7:30 p.m. at MICA's Brown Center. The Maryland Film Festival continues at various venues through Sunday, May 6.

Friday and Saturday it's time for lemon peppermint sticks and funky hats at the Flower Mart, now in its 90th year in Mt. Vernon. Friday night at 8 p.m. Spoon Popkins presents the Dirty Pictures art show - an overview of local artists (including Spoon, Dan van Allen, J.M. Giordano, Uli Loskot and Jade Gorman) whose work is inspired and informed by pornography - at the Shinola Gallery.

Saturday, Baltimore's "Almost Famous Annual East Coast National Championship Kinetic Sculpture Race" will take place once again at the American Visionary Arts Museum.

And the 133rd runing of the Kentucky Derby will take place at Churchill Downs in Louisville, Kentucky.

And the 40th annual Towsontown Spring Festival is happening in ye olde Towson town. It purportedly celebrates arts and crafts and whatnot, but for non-breeders under the age of 35 (i.e., young professionals and co-eds) it usually is just an excuse to get wasted in the 98 Rock Beer Garden listening to crappy rock bands.

And, speaking of excessive drinking, Saturday, May 5 also just happens to be Cinco de Mayo (or Cinco de Drinko, depending on how entusiastically one chooses to celebrate it). Cue up The Champs' "Tequilla" and let the Bacchanal begin.

Oh yeah, and of local interest to Rodgers Forge residents (and pious Catholics) is the St. Pius Spring Fair around the corner from my house. It's a mixed bag, but one year I did score a complete set of The Encycopedia of Human Sexuality at their the book sale table for a song (it was probably banned by the Church, hence the discount!)

Did I miss anything? For someone with attention deficit (like me), it's all too much. So if you're heading downtown, be advised it's going to be crowded and hard to park. And busy!